OK, not really. Eastern has been around since 1895, when someone thought to open a teacher's college in Charleston, Illinois. Today, 11,000 students gather to study (sometimes) everything from education to earth science. Our basketall team has the honor of getting spanked in the NCAA basketball tournament every now and again. Our smartest alum runs a tool-and-die shop down in Wood River.

But we've got other things. We have a bar located within the campus, a crazy all-freshman dormitory, greasy-good pizza joints and bingo nights with townies. Most important, whether you drank all day or studied all night, Eastern Illinois University was FUN!

So what's the most important thing to a school with no intellectual currency to speak of? Famous students, that's what.

And that's why we need the Eastern Illinois University (Unofficial) Hall of Fame. This is the ONLY legitimate (and illegitimate) place to honor/poke fun at the famous folks who once walked the tundra, got high in the quad, broke into school buildings, passed out in frat houses and get the words "Eastern Illinois University" mentioned in the media some place other than the crime and obituary sections. Most of what you read here is true. Some of it is biting sarcasm. Other parts? Well, they are pretty juicy rumors.

Now sure, some of these people never really graduated from Eastern. Some only went for a semester. But really: alum, student, part-time student, never really went there, blah blah blah. What's the difference? It's all for the good of Eastern. And the Eastern Illinois University (Unofficial) Hall of Fame is down with that. Shouldn't you be too?

It should be said that the Eastern Illinois University (Unofficial) Hall of Fame is in no way, shape or form connected with or endorsed by Eastern Illinois University. They don't really care about the famous alums, er, students anyway. This place is the independent creation of The Curator and continues to thrive thanks to the contributions of alumni in several states who care about their school.

The whole idea of the place started on a whim. Legend has it, one courageous alum was defending EIU from the barbs of coworkers from Michigan, Northwestern, New York University and the University of Delaware when he realized he knew enough to really pay tribute to Eastern's best students. He put those ideas on the internet in 1997. Now, this place is followed closely by hundreds of alums and watched warily by Eastern's alumni association.

For those who never knew EIU, welcome! For those who graduated, welcome back!

Yours in Eastern Illinois University,

Billy Panther
Fictitious Unofficial Spokesmascot
for the EIU (Unofficial) Hall of Fame